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Tour Diary #1: From Where My Feet Fit—The Millenium’s Matt Hasenmueller

Lately there has been a lot of light being shed upon the issue of mental health, and people in the music industry. Especially on the subject of depression and anxiety.  Being someone who is affected by both, I wanted an opportunity to talk about my personal experiences, and the extreme ups and downs that come with traveling, and playing music, and thanks to idobi Radio, I have a place to put my thoughts for at least the next two weeks.

August 13th — Bremen cafe | Milwaukee, WI

Milwaukee

Today started fast and has yet to release its grip. I started my day on the It’s So Much Friendlier With… Tour  (ISMFWT) and I won’t end a day differently for quite awhile.  Today especially has felt as if I’m stuck in the pitch, waiting to let go of stress, but being held back by some kind of cosmic force. Recently I have severed ties with someone very close to me and with that loss of emotional direction I have found myself stuck in drunken vagabond, like a soggy sail with no breeze.

In my life I am intoxicated with the normalcy of the day to day. One of the most comforting traditions I have on tour is watching the world go by from the window seat. I tend to over-analyze most everything in my life, and it’s comforting to know life is still operating in a normal way.

Steeped in free beer, tonight’s show had to be acoustic. Unfortunately there was a miscommunication with our booking agent and the promoter, and the show was 21+ with the sound system being less than what was promised. However, it did not stop some of our most dedicated fans, and friends from watching our set from the window, and that was one of the coolest things I’ve experienced. It felt like a prison phone.

Although being on tour is where I find my feet fit best, I can’t help but feel a sense of alienation this time around.

Until tomorrow.

Today’s Soundtrack:

You, Me and Everyone We Know — “Does it Amaze Thee?”

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